It’s time we inspected the Tradwife label a little closer.
Picking up in the midst of the pandemic and continuing into this summer, Tradwife influencers have taken the internet by storm. By now, many of us are at least familiar with videos of Nara Smith in her white kitchen, making her toddlers cereal from scratch.
As with all internet phenomena, people are quick to poke holes in trending matters and voice their critiques. This time around, the topic under fire is the Tradwife and how it perpetuates stereotypes of women, rather than promoting pride around a personal lifestyle choice.
Tradwife, short for “traditional housewife,” refers to women who believe in upholding traditional gender roles as wives and mothers. In practice, tradwives commonly adopt homemaking, raising children, and tending to their husbands as core lifestyle values.
While the traditional housewife has been in existence for decades, the popularity and controversy of this lifestyle have only gained recent exposure through the lens of social media and Tradwife influencers. Unfortunately, that lens is narrow and highly curated.
It can be misleading for young women to watch influencers of the same age, who are successful mothers and wives, derive fulfillment from performing domestic tasks and caring for their families. The issue isn’t the traditional nature of these lives, it’s the lack of honesty. Influencers market their own idyllic lives as an attainable standard without acknowledging how privilege and financial status play a major role in their success.
These women have ive husbands and endless resources at their disposal that allow them to pursue their lifestyle of choice with relative ease. For many women, this lifestyle isn’t a choice but a necessity driven by circumstances.
Unlike the curated and idealized portrayals seen online, for the average housewife or stay-at-home mom, raising a family isn’t glamorous or effortless. This deviation from Tradwife content isn’t an exception—their experiences just aren’t shown or talked about on the internet. For those who have to work at home out of obligation rather than choice, seeing tradwives cooking and cleaning like it’s a hobby can feel like inescapable mockery.
On the surface, it’s appealing to watch and even imagine being a tradwife, where kitchens are always fully stocked, kids are well-behaved, and the women perform their tasks with elegance and perfection. But that’s not the whole picture.
It’s easy to forget that it’s these women’s jobs to captivate viewers with their lifestyles, to perform in front of a camera.
Much of the anti-tradwife discourse stems from the assumption it’s anti-feminist—by submitting to and serving their husbands women are regressing to patriarchal structures. Yet, the opposite can also be said about tradwifery, that a woman exemplifies equality and autonomy by choosing to pursue a traditional lifestyle.
On either end of the spectrum, women are being lumped in with a stereotype when they are simply trying to live their lives.
We need to stop using the Tradwife label to pit women against each other, especially ourselves with those we see online. Women can choose to be a housewife out of belief, or tend to the home and their kids because they have no other choice. Traditional or not, putting them under that label is more restrictive than productive.
Tradwives have had enough time in the limelight. It’s time we started expanding the narrative of womanhood and motherhood to accept the in-between voices that aren’t yet heard.
—Journal Editorial Board
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