Whether you love them or loathe them, trad wives’ presence on social media is impossible to ignore.
This International Women’s Week, my explore pages have become overrun with hopeful messages of feminism, neatly packaged in purple Canva templates adorned with empowering slogans and tied together with a resolute #girlpower bow.
I’m reminded of historic days in women’s history when our collective struggle culminated in hard-won victories: the right to cast our ballots, the opportunity to pursue education, the entrance into traditionally male-dominated professions, and the freedom to control our own finances. With each reminder, I feel a surge of gratitude towards the courageous trailblazers who paved the way for my autonomy, such as the Suffragettes, Gloria Steinem, Angela Davis, and Nellie McClung to name just a few.
Yet, amidst this celebration of progress, my thoughts are drawn to the nauseating TikTok trend that has the Internet up in arms, leaving me wondering what the pioneers of feminism would think about the “trad wife.”
“Trad wives,” slang for traditional wife, is an online subculture that’s recently cropped up on social media, where millennial and Gen-Z stay-at home moms, wives, and girlfriends advocate for a return to domesticity and submission through carefully curated TikTok vlogs and aesthetic Instagram posts. This movement encourages traditional homemaking roles, where women are seen as inferior and submissive to their husbands.
Though much of trad wifery is rooted in religion, made evident through Bible-quotes in Instagram bios and dainty cross tattoos, some trad wives appear to embrace the lifestyle for purely aesthetic reasons. The 1950s pinup appearances and cottage core fashion intersect in a trad wife picture of domesticity, regardless of political or religious motivations.
Some trad wives even self-identify as feminists and view their return to tradition as a reclamation of femininity.
At the end of the day, most Internet-famous trad wives are just another breed of influencer—but instead of promoting Tarte makeup on a Bora Bora trip, they’re promoting a regression to traditional gendered roles, sponsored by the patriarchy.
The telltale signs of an online trad wife are typically mommy-vlog style cooking videos, farmhouse decor, and a generally beige colour palette. As one Tweet says:
I’m in my sourdough baking, homemaking, flower arranging, mocktail drinking, organic whole foods tradwife era ✨
— The Tradwives Club (@tradwivesclub) January 30, 2024
If you find yourself thinking embracing the aesthetic side of domestic labour, you’re not alone. The Instagram page @thetradwivesclub has amassed over 26,000 followers, where women share their for the trad wife lifestyle.
TikToker and model Nara Smith has spearheaded much of this idealistic lifestyle’s popularity. Married to model Lucky Blue Smith and mother to Slim Easy and Rumble Honey (yes, these are indeed their names and not just nouns and adjectives I’ve strung together), Nara’s content showcasing her homemade meals has earned her a following of over 3 million. One such video depicts her laboriously crafting Cocoa Puffs from scratch, where viewers are captivated by her dedication to domesticity.
Though Smith’s videos are entertaining and aesthetically pleasing, they’re incredibly unattainable and embody the dangerous idealism often associated with tradwife subculture. The trend has raised concerns in many viewers for reinforcing harmful gender stereotypes by implying a woman’s primary duty is to cater to her husband and family, while men are made out to be the primary providers and decision-makers.
In a day and age where women have gained more autonomy and economic independence, it’s concerning to see a surging trend towards outdated ideologies and lifestyles. Trends, particularly on social media, are effective and influential in shaping beliefs and attitudes, especially on impressionable minds.
While I respect those who choose to embrace a tradwife lifestyle, I remain skeptical of the idyllic portrayal of domesticity inundating TikTok feeds. Beneath the surface of the perfectly spotless farmhouse kitchen counter and homemade oat pancakes is a troubling reinforcement of harmful gender binaries seeking to erode the hard-won progress toward gender equality.
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